Welcome to The Grambler, the most ill-informed blog you are ever likely to see.
Stewart was an amazing person - A wonderful husband, a fantastic brother, a loving son and an adored uncle. He was also a brilliant friend and colleague and is missed by so many people. His family are determined that his death will never be in vain and are doing their part to beat bowel cancer for good. We are fundraising for the Bobby Moore Fund which is part of Cancer Research UK and specialises in research into bowel cancer. If you wish to donate to the fund, you can via https://www.justgiving.com/Geraldine-Smith3 .
If you haven’t already done so, please read the article which appeared in the Daily Record and learn from Stewart’s story that you must never be complacent. It makes grim reading for us, his family, even though we were beside him throughout his ordeal, or battle; call it what you will. http://www.dailyrecord.co.uk/lifestyle/heartbroken-widow-geraldine-smith-raises-3452997
Similarly, if you haven’t heard it, please listen to Geraldine’s moving radio interview which was on Radio Scotland.
Stewart began writing The Grambler when he was between procedures and hoping for some form of recovery. He loved all aspects of football and was a lifelong Motherwell supporter. His wish was that The Grambler should continue after his death and I have been happy to oblige. Read on and enjoy…
My favourite rag, the Daily Fail [You are being sarcastic, I take it. - Ed.], is at it again... Headline suggesting something important/startling/exciting etc. followed by a story that is actually pretty dull.
Last Saturday’s (Or was it the previous Saturday’s? Or perhaps even the week before that, even.) edition had an exciting headline on page 11... ‘Boris sees off the bear’. Wow! What a guy! Imagine that; Prime Minister Bojo fights off a bear... Hang on a mo... When would our esteemed leader ever be put in such a position that he single-handedly dealt with a large carnivore? Obviously, he wasn’t. The main headline is followed by the sub-headline... PM’s plane helps repel Russian jets. That’s more like it. Scramble, scramble, scramble... Biggles Bozza takes his crate up to save us all in a second Battle of Britain. Well done Bozza! I can just see him shaking his fist and telling us all, ‘Never was so much owed by so many to so few... We will fight them on the beaches... etc.’ Cue Dambusters theme.
Except, it was nothing like that. [Obviously. - Ed.] Bozza neither owns nor pilots a plane. The aeroplane in question belongs to, and is piloted by, the RAF. It is known as the RAF Voyager. It is painted in jingoistic red, white and blue with the words United Kingdom emblazoned across its fuselage. Boris obviously sees it as competition for Air Force One which ferries Mr Fart around the world.
You are probably wondering, repelling Russian jets? What the blibbing flip happened? I’ll tell you. Nothing. Well, almost nothing. Way back in March, two RAF jets were scrambled because some Russian planes, Tupolev Tu-95 ‘Bears’, were heading towards British airspace. No interception was actually required. That’s good, then.
Bears are really scary and so are the plane-type bears. Or, are they? They were introduced in 1956... 1956? 64 years ago. Not exactly state of the art, then. Indeed not. They are not even jets as the headline declared; they are turbo-prop driven with a top speed of just over 500 miles per hour.
No interception necessary, we are told. It seems that the Bears did not even enter British airspace; the RAF jets were not actually needed. It may have been that their mere presence was enough to make the Bear pilots [What? They were naked? - Ed.] ahem... turn for home. The article does not make this clear. Perhaps there was never any intention of getting even close to the UK. We will never know.
Hold on, you might be saying, where does Bozza’s Voyager fit into this non-story. Well, when this huge airliner isn’t ferrying Boris and his ego around, it is used for another task; it is used to refuel RAF planes in flight. That was its involvement. It was used to fuel the two RAF planes which may... or may not... have ‘encouraged’ the Tupolevs to turn home.
Boris sees off the bear? To paraphrase The Monks*, nice headline, shame about the story.
* The Monks - One hit wonders with this
I'm flying in the air...
.....oooOooo.....
Let’s move on to the birthday honours, shall we?
Were any famous or notorious individuals born on the 11th of July? Of course there were. Here are some that even I know.
Robert the Bruce 1274 (The original Spiderman.), Thomas Bowdler 1754 (Tw*t that f*ck*d up no end of English works of literature by removing anything he thought was ‘mucky stuff’. What a pr*ck!), John Quincy Adams 1767 (The well-known president played by Jack Klugman.), James Whistler 1834 (He could paint, too.), Harry Gordon 1893 (Entertainer.), Granville Slack 1906 (Judge and coal merchant.), Stuart Latham 1912 (Film and TV director and producer. He was the original producer of Corrie back in 1960.), Reg Varney 1916 (Actor about whom it was said, ‘I ’ate you, Butler.’), Gough Whitlam 1916 (The will-nine Strine prohm meenister.), Yul Brynner 1920 (Actor famous for shaving his head when baldness wasn’t trendy.), David Graham 1924 or 1925 (Voice actor famous for uttering the words, ‘Yus, milady.’), Patrick Wymark 1926 (Ectaw. John Wilder in The Power Game. Him.), David Kelly 1929 (Actor. Cousin Enda in Me Mammy. Him.), Tab Hunter 1931 (Actor. Had a hit record or two. Here’s Young Love. He looks decidedly uncomfortable in that clip.), Georgio Armani 1934 (Tailor.), John Stride 1936 (Ectaw. David Main in The Main Chance. Him.), John Walters 1939 (Radio producer and broadcaster.), Tommy Vance 1940 (DJ. He called himself TV on the radio. Oh how we laughed.), Rolf Stommelen 1943 (Rennfahrer.), Bonnie Pointer 1950 (A sister. A clip is in order. Time to get funky. I said funky.), Leon Spinks 1953 (Boxy bloke. [How exactly does one spink? - Ed.]), Johann Lamont 1957 (Politician.), Mark Lester 1958 (Actor turned osteopath.), Richie Sambora 1959 (Musician. Bon Jovi guitarist, but here’s a solo toon Hard Times Come Easy), Suzanne Vega 1959 (Musician. Another clip? Why not. Here’s We of Me. [You what? - Ed.]), Tony Marchant 1959 (Playwright and screenwriter. Holding On. One of his.), Caroline Quentin 1960 (Actress. Dorothy in Men Behaving Badly. Her.), Pauline McLynn 1962 (Actress famous saying, ‘Ah go on go on go on go on go on...’), Craig Charles 1964 (Poet, actor, comedian and DJ. Dave Lister in Red Dwarf. Him.), Tony Cottee 1965 (Footy bloke.), Mel Appleby 1966 (Singer. Half of Mel and Kim. Have a clip. Here’s F.L.M.), Ricky Warwick 1966 (Musician. Vocalist with The Almighty. Have a bit of thrash. Here’s Wrench.), Daisy Donovan 1975 (TV presenter. [Didn’t she have a hit with Kylie Minogue? - Ed.]), Kimberley Jones aka Lil’ Kim 1975 (Singer. Have a clip. Here’s Lighters Up. Wouldn’t be allowed nowadays.), Katrina Bryan 1980 (Actress. Nina in Nina and the Neurons. Her.), Jody Firth 1981 (Racey car bloke.), Kellie Shirley 1981 (Actress. Kirsty in In the Long Run. Her.), Rob Heaps 1983 (Actor. Ezra Bloom in Imposters. Him.), Scott Agnew 1987 (Fitba guy. Guess what his nickname is. [Ooh, have the teasers started early? - Ed.] No... Aggy! Poor sod.) and Matthew Tarrant 1990 (Rowy boaty bloke. [Didn’t he used to present Who wants to be a Millionaire? - Ed.] No. Don’t be silly.).
And now... July the 18th
Robert Hooke 1635 (Polymath and Peter Pan’s nemesis.), Hugh McNeile 1795 (Calvinist.), William Makepeace Thackarey 1811 (Jake’s dad.), W.G. Grace 1848 (Amazing crickety bloke.), Philip Snowden 1864 (Politician.), Stuart Lindsell 1892 (Jobbing actor.), Phyllis Morris 1984 (Jobbing actress.), Vidkun Quisling 1887 (Nazi puppet.), Marie Ney 1895 (Jobbing actress. Her film career spanned five decades.), John Stuart 1898 (Jobbing actor whose film career spanned 58 years during which he appeared in more than 140 films. Take that Marie Ney!), Barry Gray 1908 (Composer and arranger... He arranged music, he wasn’t a ranger... I’ll get me coat. How about a clip? He did all the Gerry Anderson ‘Supermarionation’ scores in the 1960s. We’ve had the Thunderbirds theme before, so let’s have Joe 90 this time.), Harry Llewellyn 1911 (Horse jumpy bloke.), Hume Cronyn 1911 (Actor.), Red Skelton 1913 (Comedian, it says.), Eric Pohlmann 1913 (Actor. If any 1970s British production needed someone to play an authentic German, Eric was your man... even though he was actually Austrian.), Nelson Mandela 1918 (The greatest politician ever.), John Glenn 1921 (Spaceman.), Michael Medwin 1923 (Actor. Appeared in 86 films and 21 TV productions in a career spanning 62 years. Ha! Take that smuggy John Stuart!), Richard Pasco 1926 (Another jobbing actor. Made films for Hammer Studios.), Bryan Johnson 1926 (Actor and Singer. Provided the UK entry in 1960’s Eurovision Song Contest. Now where is it? Down there? No, it’s up here.), Kurt Masur 1927 (Conductor. Hold very tight, please.), Jalacy ‘Screaming Jay’ Hawkins 1929 (Musician. This was a hit back in 1956. I Put a Spell on You.), Burt Kwouk 1930 (Actor. If ever any British TV production was looking for someone to play Japanese with authenticity, Burt was your man... Even though - you’ll have already guessed - he was really English. Ha! That threw you. He was born in Warrington. ‘Only’ appeared in 58 films, and 38 TV productions.), Hunter S. Thompson 1937 (Orfer.), Ian Stewart 1938 (A Rolling Stone in all but name. Manager Andrew Loog Oldham thought he didn’t look right for the band and so, though he was still part of the band, his face was missing from any publicity material or photos. It says a lot for the guy that he stayed with the band as road manager and pianist for over two decades. You can hear his work on this rather well-known toon, Ayunjeh.), Brian Auger 1939 (Keyboard wizard. Here is Julie Driscoll and the Brian Auger Trinity with... no, not that one... Save Me.), Dion DiMucci 1939 (Musician. Have a clip. Here's The Wanderer. If he behaved like that these days, he’d be locked up.), James Brolin 1940 (Actor. Josh’s dad.), Johnny Hutchinson 1940 (Drummer and vocalist with The Big Three. Have a clip. Here’s Some Other Guy.), Franz Farian 1941 (Songwriter/producer. The ‘voice’ of Bobby Farrell, the miming dancer of Boney M. I think a clip is in order. Here’s Daddy Cool.), Martha Reeves 1941 (Singer. Had a few hits with a couple of Vandellas. Here is Jimmy Mack.), Dave Cash 1942 (DJ.), David Hemery 1944 (Runny jumpy bloke.), Danny McCulloch 1945 (The Animals’ bassist. Here’s a solo track Wings of a Man.), James Faulkner 1948 (Actor. Randyll Tarly in Game of Thrones. Him.), Jim Watt 1948 (Boxery guy.), Dennis Lillee 1949 (Strine creekuddy blake.), Glenn Hughes 1950 (A Village Person. He was Leatherman... Not the best superhero name, it has to be said. All together now... Young man...), Richard Branson 1950 (Rich bloke.), Terry Chambers 1955 (Ex XTC drummer. Here’s a track he featured on - Wonderland.), Nick Faldo 1957 (Golfy bloke.), Keith Levene 1957 (Musician. Co-founder of The Clash and PIL. Here’s If 6 Was 9.), Pauline Quirke 1959 (Actress. Sharon Theodopolopodous in Birds of a Feather. Her.), Simon Heffer 1960 (Journalist. Not a cow, in case you were wondering.), Alan Pardew 1961 (Footy bloke.), Davie Irons 1961 (Fitba guy.), Mark Sinclair 1967 (Who? You know him better as Vin Diesel, the well-known plank of wood.), Jonathan Gould 1968 (Footy bloke.), Gruff Rhys 1970 (A Super Furry Animal... among other things. Here’s Something 4 The Weekend.), Mathangi "Maya" Arulpragasam aka M.I.A. 1975 (Singer. Have some Paper Planes.), Kelly Reilly 1977 (Actress. Kerra in Brittania. Her.), Micah Balfour 1978 (Actor. Jermaine Bailey in Emmerdale. Him.), Gareth Emery 1980 (Electronic dance music producer... He produces the music which is electronic... He isn’t electronic ... I’ll get me coat. Here’s Sanctuary.), Kashy Keegan 1983 (Musician. This is his dream.), James Norton 1985 (Actor. Sidney Chambers in Grantchester. Him.), Laura Carmichael 1986 (Actress. Lady Edith Crawley in Downton Abbey. Her.), Jordan Ramos 1995 (Athleticky bloke.) and Fionn Whitehead 1997 (Actor. Tommy in Dunkirk. Him.)
Don’t forget the 25th of July...
James I of Scotland 1394 (The well-known king.), Walter Brennan 1894 (Actor, mainly in cowboy roles.), Gavrilo Princip 1894 (Bosnian Serb revolutionary whose actions were responsible for the start of The Great War.), Cyril Luckham 1907 (Jobbing actor.), Woody Strode 1914 (Athlete turned actor., Kevin Stoney 1921 (Another jobbing actor.), Estelle Getty 1923 (Actress. Sophia Petrillo in The Golden Girls. Her.), Benny Benjamin 1925 (Drummer with the Funk Brothers. A clip? Deferably. This might start you scratching.), Dick Passwater 1925 (Racey car bloke. Actually, I’ve never heard of him, but how could I not include someone with a name like that?), William Marlowe 1930 (Yet another jobbing actor.), Annie Ross 1930 (Actor and singer. Snuffed it just this week.), Adnan Khashoggi 1935 (Rich bloke.), Brian Finch 1936 (Scriptwriter. Wrote over 150 episodes of Corrie.), Denis King 1939 (Composer. Started his career with brothers Mike and Tony when he was just 13. Here is one of their hits, Standing on The Corner.), Manny Charlton 1941 (Guitarist with this band. Here he is playing Razamanaz. Let’s rawwwk!), Bruce Woodley 1942 (A Seeker. Have a clip. Here’s Morningtown Ride.), Jim McCarty 1943 (Drummer with the Yardbirds. Here’s an oddity he and Keith Relf came up with... Henry's Coming Home.), Lynne Frederick 1954 (Actress famous for being married to Peter Sellers.), Sheena McDonald 1954 (Journalist and broadcaster.), Paul Hegerty 1954 (Fitba guy.), Iman 1955 (Mrs Bowie.), Darren Jackson 1966 (Fitba guy.), Matt LeBlanc 1967 (Actor.), Chloe Annett 1971 (Actress. Kristine Kochansky in Red Dwarf VII. Her.), Steve Mason 1971 (Musician. A clip? Certainly. Here’s the Beta Band with Assessment.), Kevin Phillips 1973 (Footy bloke.), Paul Epworth 1974 (Award-winning record producer. Here he is as Phones with Sharpen the Knives.), Louise Brown 1978 (First IVF baby.), Ali Carter 1979 (Snookery bloke.), Brad Renfro 1982 (Actor.) and Nelson Piquet Jr. 1985 (Card game.).
I’ve received a letter...
Dear Mr Tamblyn,
I am a great fan of The Rolling Stones and did enjoy hearing Angie again. Like so many Stones’ songs, it did better in the States than in the UK. It was their seventh No. 1 over there. They would have to wait another five years for another No. 1. Here is a teaser for your readers, can you name that eighth American chart topper?
Incidentally, I would be grateful if you don’t print my full name. Perhaps you could just put my title and the initial letter of my surname. Thanks.
Yours shyly,
.....oooOooo.....
Time to gramble. It has been two weeks since your favourite ill-informed blog was posted, so there is a bit of catching up to do. So how did those bets fare?
Blackburn vs Leeds - Away win
Result - Blackburn 1 Leeds 3
Yay!
The visitors took an early lead when Mateusz Klich tackled Lewis Travers 30 yards from goal and slipped the ball through for Patrick Bamford to slot home.
Lewis Holtby thundered an effort against the post for Rovers before Kalvin Phillips curled in a superb 25-yard free-kick to give the Whites a 2-0 lead at the break.
Adam Armstrong halved the deficit soon after half-time with a wonderful free-kick of his own, but Klich quickly restored the two-goal advantage with a shot that Rovers keeper Christian Walton probably should have done better with.
Brentford vs Wigan - Home win
Result - Brentford 3 Wigan 0
Yay again!
The Bees should have been ahead in the third minute when they had three efforts on target in quick succession - Bryan Mbeumo's volley was deflected over after Ollie Watkins' shot had been well blocked by Antonee Robinson following a Henrik Dalsgaard strike that was palmed away.
Wigan were rocked two minutes later when centre-back Leon Balogun was forced off with an injury and Kal Naismith was moved to centre-back.
Naismith's clearing header from Watkins' cross led to the opening goal as Emiliano Marcondes headed the ball back into the path of Said Benrahma, who calmly volleyed into the bottom corner.
Brentford's passing game started to come to the fore and Naismith was again on hand to clear off the line after Dalsgaard's cross was deflected goalwards shortly before Benrahma's speculative ball early in the second period floated over goalkeeper David Marshall and into the net.
Watkins then had two more close-range efforts cleared off the line, but the Bees only had to wait five more minutes for Benrahma to add the third as he shot low into the bottom corner after good work down the right flank from Josh Dasilva and Christian Norgaard.
Wigan failed to have an effort on target in the entire match and their day went from bad to worse when Garner was dismissed with nine minutes to go after his raised foot hit the torso of Jan Zamburek.
Fulham vs Birmingham - Home win
Result - Fulham 1 Birmingham 0
Once more, Yay!
Josh Onomah swept home from 12 yards in the fifth minute of added time to reward a late Fulham flourish.
It took them more than 85 minutes to truly threaten Blues keeper Lee Camp, who then produced fine saves to deny Joe Bryan, Bobby Decordova-Reid and Onomah before the latter's decisive strike.
Blues had created the better chances to that point and teenager Jude Bellingham could have had a hat-trick in the first 15 minutes.
The 17-year-old fluffed his first opening and was later denied by Cottagers keeper Marek Rodak and the woodwork as Fulham escaped unpunished for a string of sloppy early defensive errors.
Bristol City vs Cardiff - Away win
Result - Bristol City 0 Cardiff 1
And again, Yay!
Danny Ward came off the bench to score a late winner for Cardiff City at Bristol City.
The visitors had most of the limited scoring opportunities in a gritty first half, though both sides sharpened their attacking threat after the break.
Cardiff midfielder Will Vaulks had a shot well saved by Daniel Bentley, before a volley from Bristol City's Nakhi Wells was brilliantly stopped by Alex Smithies.
Robins substitute Filip Benkovic missed a glorious chance when he headed wide from a corner and, with five minutes left, his miss was punished as Lee Tomlin threaded a perfect through ball for fellow substitute Ward to finish clinically.
Stoke vs Barnsley - Home win
Result - Stoke 4 Barnsley 0
Blimey! Yay again!
The Potters raced into a two-goal lead inside the opening ten minutes with Sam Vokes rising to head home a Sam Clucas corner, before Tyrese Campbell tucked home James McClean's cut-back with a clever backheel.
Campbell scored his second in the 38th minute through a well-worked corner routine, side-footing McClean's low cross beyond Barnsley keeper Jack Walton.
The visitors created very few chances and Stoke rounded off the victory with a fourth late on when substitute Tom Ince curled in a powerful strike off the underside of the bar.
There’s more. Even though there was no grambler.com last week, there were five predictions made by The Grambler. They were posted on Facebook and Twitter and were as follows.
Blackburn vs West Brom - Away win
Result - Blacburn 1 West Brom 1
Ooh! ’It the bar!
Albion went ahead on 41 minutes when Charlie Austin picked out Krovinovic with a far-post cross who found the bottom-left corner from 12 yards.
Having scored four minutes before the interval, he should then have done so again four minutes after the restart, but when Mateus Pereira shot from range and Christian Walton could only parry, Krovinovic hit the right post with the rebound.
It took a quadruple substitution [Four subs. What is going on? - Ed.] by Mowbray to turn the game Rovers' way as two of the replacements combined to level within two minutes of coming on.
Sam Gallagher galloped down the right, and outmuscled Kyle Bartley before pulling it back and the untracked Joe Rothwell drilled home from 12 yards.
Albion's own newly-arrived subs nearly put their team back in front when, from the artful Pereira's lovely chipped ball over the top, Hal Robson-Kanu squared left to Grady Diangana, but he missed his kick.
It was Rovers who came closest to snatching all three points.
West Brom needed a point-blank save by advancing keeper Sam Johnstone to deny the fifth of Mowbray's subs, Jacob Davenport. [Fifth sub? This is madness. - Ed.]
Then, in a crazy scramble, Albion were finally rescued when Bartley cleared off the line from another of the Blackburn 'game changers', Lewis Holtby.
Middlesbrough vs Bristol City - Home win
Result - Middlesbrough 1 Bristol City 3
Boo!
Nahki Wells put the Robins ahead with a looping shot off the post.
Dael Fry wastefully blasted over and George Saville saw a header tipped on to the bar for the hosts, before Jamie Paterson doubled City's advantage from an acute angle just before the break.
Wells poked home a third for the visitors with 11 minutes remaining, and while Britt Assombalonga pulled a goal back soon after, it was little more than a consolation effort.
Stoke vs Birmingham - Home win
Result - Stoke 2 Birmingham 0
Yay!
Danny Batth turned in Nick Powell's cross at the back post.
Captain Sam Clucas added a second just before the break with a curling right-footed shot into the top corner.
Sam Vokes and James McClean both hit the crossbar, while McClean and Powell also had efforts well saved by Blues goalkeeper Lee Camp.
Swansea vs Leeds - Away win
Result - Swansea 0 Leeds 1
Yay!
A game of few clear-cut chances looked set to end goalless until Swansea old boy Pablo Hernandez's low shot rolled in off the post a minute from time.
Sheff Utd vs Chelsea - Away win
Result - Sheffield Utd 3 Chelsea 0
Boo!
David McGoldrick opened the scoring, pouncing after Kepa Arrizabalaga had saved brilliantly from a deflected Oli McBurnie shot in the 18th minute.
Chelsea's defence was shaky throughout and they were ruthlessly punished just 15 minutes later when Enda Stevens crossed and McBurnie was left completely unmarked in the six-yard box to power home a simple header.
The damage was completed when McGoldrick capitalised on a dreadful defensive mix-up to plunder his second late in the second half.
And to cap things off, it is possible to give you the results from the 18th of July which were...
Fulham vs Sheffield Wed - Home win - Evens
Result - Fulham 5 Sheffield Wed 3
Yay!
Aleksandar Mitrovic and Neeskens Kebano both scored twice as Fulham won a nervy eight-goal thriller against Sheffield Wednesday.
The first of two well-taken Kebano goals put the hosts ahead early on before Mitrovic scored his goals.
His first was a coolly taken first-time finish from a tight angle, while his second was somewhat less assured as he slipped in the process of putting his penalty away after Dominic Iorfa brought down Kebano.
Marek Rodak's foul on Jacob Murphy soon after the interval allowed Atdhe Nuhiu to pull a goal back from the spot, but a Kebano free-kick restored the three-goal advantage before Murphy grabbed a second late on for the Owls.
Nuhiu set up a tense finish with an 89th-minute header, but Bobby Decordova-Reid's injury-time goal from distance made the three points safe for a Fulham side that finished a man down after Harrison Reed was shown a second caution.
Preston vs Birmingham - Home win
Result - Preston 2 Birmingham 0
Yay!
A goal in each half from Patrick Bauer and Brad Potts won the hosts the three points.
German defender Bauer put them ahead two minutes before the break.
Paul Gallagher's cunningly floated out-swinging corner somehow evaded all the jumpers at the near post and Bauer was left unmarked eight yards out to slide a low right-foot finish on the half volley, to Blues keeper Lee Camp's left.
Birmingham came closest to levelling just after the break when, after a half-cleared corner dropped to Gary Gardner five yards outside the box, the City midfielder's stunning right-foot volley was brilliantly saved by home keeper Declan Rudd, who somehow tipped it over.
But Preston settled it three minutes from time when a poor clearing header fell square to Potts, who raced on into the box before drilling a low left-foot shot across Camp into the far corner.
QPR vs Millwall - Away win
Result - QPR 4 Millwall 3
Boo!
R's defender Conor Masterson turned in to put the hosts ahead, but Matt Smith swept home soon after the restart to draw the Lions level.
Rangers quickly regained the lead through Ryan Manning's long-range strike and Ebere Eze raced away from the Lions defence to add a third just after the hour mark.
Shaun Hutchinson gave the Lions hope of a comeback, but Todd Kane headed in to make it 4-2 before Jayson Molumby grabbed a consolation deep into stoppage time.
Stoke vs Brentford - Away win
Result - Stoke 1 Brentford 0
Boo!
The only goal came in the first half when Lee Gregory tapped in after visiting goalkeeper David Raya palmed out Sam Clucas' long-range strike.
Brentford put in arguably one of their poorest performances of an otherwise excellent season and their prolific front three of Ollie Watkins, Said Benrahma and Bryan Mbeumo were kept quiet.
Centre-back Ethan Pinnock almost scored a dramatic leveller deep into stoppage time but his stinging effort was superbly tipped wide by Adam Davies.
Swansea vs Bristol C - Home win
Result - Swansea 1 Bristol City 0
Yay!
Connor Roberts struck from close range late in the first half.
Swansea had to hang on after the break, with Bristol City's Famara Diedhiou wasting a chance to equalise from the penalty spot.
There being no footy taking place at the weekend, thanks to the leagues all coming to what has been a faltering conclusion, we will take a wee break from grambling this week.
.....oooOooo.....
Teaser time. Yay! How did you get on with your five questions? Here are the answers.
1. Who am I?
I was born in the Ivory Coast in 1978. I was the all-time top scorer for my national team. Most of my playing career was spent at Chelsea (2 spells) where I played 254 games and scored 104 goals including a hat-trick in the UEFA Champions League.
Answer: Didier Drogba
2. Who is the top scoring Belgian player in the Premier League?
Answer: Romelu Lukaku with 113 goals
3. Who was the youngest manager to win the Premier League?
Answer: The special one himself, Jose Mourhino who was just 42
4. Which Scottish club’s ground is called Cliftonhill?
Answer: Albion Rovers
5. Apart from Bobby Moore who is the only World Cup winning captain to play for an English club (at the time of winning)?
Answer: Hugo Lloris
Five for this week? Why not.
1. Who am I
I was born in 1940 in Aberdeen. I began my senior career at Huddersfield. Four years later I signed for Manchester City who paid £55,000 for me, a British record at the time. After a year, I signed for Torino for another record fee, before moving to Manchester United for yet another record fee. I hold the club record for most goals scored in a single season (46). I am the only Scot to have won the Balon d’Or award.
2. Who was the last English-born manager to win the FA Cup?
3. Which Premier League team’s original name was St. Lukes
4. Which country has hosted the most UEFA European Cup/UEFA Champions League finals?
5. Which nation became a full UEFA member in 2016 and played England for the first time in 2019?
There you have it; five teasers to test you. Can you answer them without resorting to Googlie (or any other search engine, for that matter)?
.....oooOooo.....
As usual (at the risk of repeating myself), I remind you of the main reason for continuing to publish this blog – to raise awareness about bowel cancer. If you have any bowel problems, don’t be fobbed off with the line that you are too young for bowel cancer to be a consideration. Just point your doctor in the direction of http://www.bowelcanceruk.org.uk/campaigns-policy/latest-campaigns/never-too-young-campaign
.....oooOooo.....
Please, also take the time to click on this link, an informative little video from Mersh (a great friend of Stewart’s).
…..oooOooo…..
And finally, Cyril? And finally, Esther, I am indebted to a Miss K. Bryan an actress who appears mainly in children's television programmes. However, for this week's finishing clip, here she is famously choosing a name for her new born baby.
That’s all for this week folks, but remember you can read the musings of The Grambler every week (well, most weeks) by going to the blog at www.thegrambler.com where you can also catch up on any previous editions you may have missed.
Happy grambling.