Wednesday, 26 April 2017

Week 38 - The Grambler on Gollum, sorry, meant David Moyes


Stewart was an amazing person - A wonderful husband, a fantastic brother, a loving son and an adored uncle. He was also a brilliant friend and colleague and is missed by so many people. His family are determined that his death will never be in vain and are doing their part to beat bowel cancer for good. We are fundraising for the Bobby Moore Fund which is part of Cancer Research UK and specialises in research into bowel cancer. If you wish to donate to the fund, you can via https://www.justgiving.com/Geraldine-Smith3 .

If you haven’t already done so, please read the article which appeared in the Daily Record and learn from Stewart’s story that you must never be complacent. It makes grim reading for us, his family, even though we were beside him throughout his ordeal, or battle; call it what you will. http://www.dailyrecord.co.uk/lifestyle/heartbroken-widow-geraldine-smith-raises-3452997

Similarly, if you haven’t heard it, please listen to Geraldine’s moving radio interview which was on Radio Scotland recently.


Stewart began writing The Grambler when he was between procedures and hoping for some form of recovery. He loved all aspects of football and was a lifelong Motherwell supporter. His wish was that The Grambler should continue after his death and I have been happy to oblige. Welcome to The Grambler, the most ill-informed blog you are ever likely to see. Read on and enjoy

 

I watched a programme on TV recently. [Really? How interesting. Yawn. - Ed.] It was about those little day cruise ships that used to operate on stretches of water such as the Bristol channel or the River Clyde. Very interesting it was, too. [If you say so. Yawn. - Ed.] As every schoolboy knows, the first ever passenger carrying steam ship was the Comet [I didn't know that. - Ed.] which began carrying paying passengers between Greenock and Glasgow. Educational, this is. Any road up, one of the people talking on the programme described the ship as the Concorde of its day. Sorry pardon excuse me? You mean it cost millions to develop, was years behind schedule and when it did finally get built, the cost to use it was prohibitive? So all the other shipbuilders of the day took one look at it and decided to stick with tried and tested sailing ships, but made them bigger to carry more passengers than ever before? Of course the talking head didn't mean that; his comparison was that the Comet and Concorde were examples of the most modern engineering skills available in their day. Unlike Concorde, the Comet was viewed as the way forward and soon dozens of similar vessels were plying the waters of the Clyde and other places. The Concorde was, indeed, the fastest passenger aircraft ever made, but operators could not afford to buy and run it and passengers were not exactly queuing up to pay a couple of grand to fly the Atlantic when a slower aircraft could be used for a tenth of the price. Those airlines that purchased the plane could only ever use it as a 'flag ship' (flag plane?) which would never actually earn money. Thus, the aircraft manufacturers of the time (ie. Boeing) took a different approach and, rather than make passenger aircraft faster, made them bigger, more economical and able to carry more passengers at a fraction of the price of Concorde. It would be a bit like buying a people carrier rather than a Ferrari. So, those Eagle comics of the fifties got it all wrong; planes would not be capable of getting around the world in an hour or so.
It set me thinking. This was an example of the latest technology not succeeding with old technology being preferred. Has such a thing ever happened before? Well, yes it has. Way way back in the nineteenth century, in fact. Maverick engineer Isembard Kingdom Brunel was the man responsible for an example of forward thinking that could have paved the way for a public transport system that would have been the envy of the world. I called him a maverick, because although he was undoubtedly a brilliant engineer, he had little regard for costs involved and most of his work went well over budget because of his attention to detail. Sometimes projects went over budget due of his sheer bloody-mindedness; he had an attitude of always thinking himself right even when he was obviously wrong. His Great Eastern steam ship was built side on to the water it was to be launched into, which caused massive problems for the engineers tasked with this part of the construction process. In the end, the cost of launching the ship was a third of the total build cost.
That isn't the project I wish to discuss, however. In 1838 Brunel's first foray into railway engineering began operations. As always, Brunel eschewed (That's a good word; I must look it up.) current practice and went about things his own way. Up until that time railways had been constructed with a gauge (the distance between the rails) of 4 feet 8 and a half inches. Brunel realised that this was too small and increased the gauge to a whopping 7 feet. His Great Western Railway provided the most comfortable travel of the day. Had the railway been constructed just five years earlier, the wider track might have been the norm throughout the country but, by the time the Great Western was up and running, too many other railways had been constructed with the narrower gauge and so, after an act of parliament of 1846 which standardised all lines, Brunel's line had to be altered to conform. It is a great shame, because railway carriages of the standard maximum width (9 feet 3 inches) would be far more stable with a wider gauge track. Indeed, it would be possible to have carriages as wide as 15 feet and still have a better ride than those currently in use. Double decked trains, anyone? If railways were being built using the construction methods available today, wider, two-level carriages would be quite feasible.
Anyway, where is this all leading us? [Nowhere? - Ed.] There is another example of modern technology being tried and then dropped with old technology continuing to be used regardless. Quilt covers. You what? Yes, quilt covers. It is something that bugs me no end. Whenever I am changing the quilt cover on my bed, in fact. [A bed bug! Ha! - Ed.] What has happened to popper studs? They were great. Pop pop pop, all done. What have we got nowadays? Buttons. Old-fashioned, awkward to fasten buttons. Bring back popper studs, I say.

 

.....oooOooo.....
 

You may have heard the expression ‘It is political correctness gone mad’. This week’s news that Sunderland manager and Gollum impersonator David Moyes has been charged over his playful comment threatening to give a female interviewer a slap is very much a case of that. How often have you made such a remark to someone? I’m sure many of you have. You never actually intended doing it; it was probably just said as a joke. Moyes’ comment was no more than that. He would never have struck the woman, but some busybody has put in a complaint and the matter (which should never have been taken seriously) has ended up with him being charged by the Football Association. Ridiculous. Whoever complained deserves a slap.*

*Please be aware that The Grambler has no intention of causing actual bodily harm to anyone. I thought I should make that clear before somebody reports me to the Ill-informed Blog Writers’ Association.

 

.....oooOooo.....
 

Were any famous or notorious people born on the 29th of April? Of course. Here are some I’ve even heard of. William Randolph Hearst 1863 (Scored the winning goal in 1966. [Surely some mistake. - Ed.]), Malcolm Sargent 1895 (Conductor. Damn, I did the bus gag a few weeks ago.), Edward ‘Duke’ Ellington 1899 (Composer, pianist and bandleader. Here’s your first clip of the week. Ellington composed many decent toons, the most famous being Take the A Train so here’s It Don't Mean a Thing.), Fred Zinnemann 1907 (Film Director. He directed a favourite joke of mine. Sorry pardon excuse me? What would be a good name for a pet jackal? Dave. Boom and indeed tish.), Zizi Jeanmaire 1924 (Ballerina. Actually, I only ever knew she existed because of that pretentious song by Peter Sarstedt.), Heinz Wolff 1928 (Churrrman zientist. Remember The Great Egg Race? That was him.), Jeremy Thorpe 1937 (Politician and one time leader of the Liberal Party.), Lonnie Donegan 1931 (The most successful British chart act of the 1950s; I think he deserves a clip. Here’s Battle of New Orleans), Rod McKuen 1933 (Gravel-voiced singer. Here’s one of his most famous toons... Jean.), Willie Nelson 1933 (Gravel-faced singer. Here’s one of his most famous toons... Always On My Mind.), Klaus Voorman 1938 (Bassist. Worked a lot with the Beatles. He also was the producer behind this catchy little toon. All together now... Aha aha aha... ), Jonah Barrington 1941 (Squashy bloke.), Francis Lee 1944 (Footy bloke with a penchant for diving. His nickname was Lee Won Pen. After his footy career he made toilet rolls.), Tommy James 1947 (Singer. With the Shondells, was famous for being a bit of a Mony Mony.), Johnny Miller 1947 (Golfy bloke.), David Icke 1952 (Footy bloke. Now a conspiracy theorist. Sorry, I meant loony.), Jerry Seinfeld 1954 (Comedian... ‘I turned 60 this year and people around that age make a bucket list. I made a bucket list, turned the "b" to an "f" and was done with it.’), Daniel Day-Lewis 1957 (Ectaw dear leddie. Won an oscar for being able to wiggle his toe, or something.), Michelle Pfeiffer 1958 (Half woman. half cat.), Andre Agassi 1970 (Tennisy bloke with a shaving rash in some odd places.) and Uma Thurman 1970 (Actress. Not a patch on Diana Rigg.).

 

.....oooOooo.....

 

Let’s move on to grambling matters. How did we do last week? We won. No, really we did. The Grambler got every prediction spot on. [I’ll just check if there is a blue moon tonight. - Ed.] So, the winnings this week really were whopping. £10.75. Woo hoo! What happened? Read on...

 

 

Hull vs Watford - Prediction Home win - 10/11

Result - Hull 2 Watford 0

Yay!

Hull endured a nightmare first half with striker Oumar Niasse being shown a controversial straight red for a challenge on M'Baye Niang in the 25th minute.

They also had a decent penalty appeal turned down, but kept their composure in the second half. Hull goalkeeper Eldin Jakupovic was central to the win, tipping over from Sebastian Prodl in the first half and then producing a point-blank save to keep out Etienne Capuoe just a minute before Hull took the lead.

The breakthrough came when a quick break ended with Kamil Grosicki crossing for Lazar Markovic to fire in on the rebound after his header came back off the bar.

Sam Clucas made sure of the points with a superb shot from distance, the midfielder controlling 25 yards from goal and firing ferociously beyond the reach of Heurelho Gomes.

 

Chesterfield vs Charlton - Prediction Away win - 17/20

Result - Chesterfield 1 Charlton 2

Yay!

Chesterfield needed a fine save by Thorsten Stuckmann in the 16th minute to keep out a Ricky Holmes free-kick from just outside the box.

Joe Rowley almost gave Chesterfield the lead in the 35th minute but two minutes later, Charlton scored when Jake Forster-Caskey was given too much time to fire a 20-yard shot into the bottom-left corner.

Chesterfield should have equalised in the 47th minute when Kristian Dennis robbed Ezri Konsa but blazed over from 12 yards and Charlton took advantage when Holmes' free-kick was deflected past Stuckmann in the 57th minute.

Reece Mitchell scored in stoppage time for Chesterfield before Forster-Caskey had a penalty saved after he was fouled by Jon Nolan.

 

Port Vale vs Bolton - Prediction Away win

Result - Port Vale 0 Bolton 2

Yay!

The home side had Riginio Cicilia sent off after 33 minutes when he was shown a second yellow card for handball following a foul on Gary Madine eight minutes earlier.

Wanderers took the lead after 66 minutes when David Wheater rose highest to nod in Filipe Morais' free-kick.

In the aftermath, referee Carl Boyeson took the players off the pitch for 10 minutes after clashes broke out between both sets of fans.

Madine then doubled the visitors' advantage, sliding home from Morais' pass in the 80th minute

 

Luton vs Notts County - Prediction Home win

Result - Luton 2 Notts County 1

Yay!

County were ahead in the sixth minute through Elliott Hewitt's finish after the ball broke to him inside the area.

Dan Potts fired into the side-netting, but Luton were level after 16 minutes as Danny Hylton's wonderful 25-yard curler hit the underside of the crossbar and Ollie Palmer headed the rebound beyond Adam Collin.

Jorge Grant flicked a header over, with Pelly Ruddock hammering off target and then making amends on the stroke of half-time, finding the bottom corner from 18 yards.

After the break, Hylton put a great chance wide, while home goalkeeper Stuart Moore made a fine stop to turn over Adam Campbell's effort in the 64th minute.

Hylton was denied by Collin, with Moore turning Mark Yeates' effort away, before Hylton saw red in stoppage time for his second booking.

 

Portsmouth vs Cambridge - Prediction Home win

Result - Portsmouth 2 Cambridge 1

Yay!

A first-half strike from Karl Baker and a superb free-kick from Kai Naismith eased Pompey to victory over a Cambridge side who turned in a lacklustre performance and only had Luke Berry's late free-kick as a consolation.

 

The best result from The Grambler for a long time; can he/she/it do it two week’s on the trot? [No. - Ed.] Let’s see what he/she/it has randomly selected this week.

Game - Result - Odds

Oxford Utd vs Shrewsbury - Prediction Home win - 3/4

Southend vs Bury - Prediction Home win - 8/11

Cheltenham vs Hartlepool - Prediction Home win - Evens

Doncaster vs Exeter - Prediction Home win - 10/11

Plymouth vs Crewe - Prediction Home win - 3/4

All matches kick off at 3pm on Saturday the 29th of April. The bets have been placed (10 x 20 pee doubles plus 1 x 20 pee accumulator) and if they all go according to The Grambler’s Prediction, the Bobby Moore Fund stands to receive a whopping...

£10.70


How whopping is that? Fives pees less whopping than last week.

 

.....oooOooo.....
 

Teaser time. Yay! Last week I asked you who was the Scottish midfielder who nearly emulated his father by playing in the 1998 World Cup finals, but didn’t because he remained an unused squad member. The answer was Scott Gemmell whose father, Archie, scored this goal in the World Cup finals against Holland in 1978 as featured in the film Trainspotting.

One for this week? How well do you know your football grounds? Most clubs have a stand or two named after famous people associated with the club and Liverpool are no exception. In 1982 new gates were erected at Anfield; whose name do they bear? Quite an easy one methinks.

 

…..oooOooo…..

 

As usual, let’s finish with a mention of the main reason for continuing to publish this blog – to raise awareness about bowel cancer. If you have any bowel problems, don’t be fobbed off with the line that you are too young for bowel cancer to be a consideration. Just point your doctor in the direction of http://www.bowelcanceruk.org.uk/campaigns-policy/latest-campaigns/never-too-young-campaign



…..oooOooo…..
 

And finally, Cyril? And finally Esther, I am indebted to a Mr P. Cook for this week’s final clip. One of the names in our birthday listings was a Mr J. Thorpe, a politician whose career was ended rather abruptly thanks to a high-profile court case. Here, Judge Peter Cook gives his summing up. .

 
 


That’s all for this week folks, but remember you can read the musings of The Grambler every week by going to the blog at www.thegrambler.com

 

Happy grambling.

 

Saturday, 22 April 2017

Week 37 - Grambleday wishes to Glen Campbell


Stewart was an amazing person - A wonderful husband, a fantastic brother, a loving son and an adored uncle. He was also a brilliant friend and colleague and is missed by so many people. His family are determined that his death will never be in vain and are doing their part to beat bowel cancer for good. We are fundraising for the Bobby Moore Fund which is part of Cancer Research UK and specialises in research into bowel cancer. If you wish to donate to the fund, you can via https://www.justgiving.com/Geraldine-Smith3 .

If you haven’t already done so, please read the article which appeared in the Daily Record and learn from Stewart’s story that you must never be complacent. It makes grim reading for us, his family, even though we were beside him throughout his ordeal, or battle; call it what you will. http://www.dailyrecord.co.uk/lifestyle/heartbroken-widow-geraldine-smith-raises-3452997

Similarly, if you haven’t heard it, please listen to Geraldine’s moving radio interview which was on Radio Scotland recently.


Stewart began writing The Grambler when he was between procedures and hoping for some form of recovery. He loved all aspects of football and was a lifelong Motherwell supporter. His wish was that The Grambler should continue after his death and I have been happy to oblige. Welcome to The Grambler, the most ill-informed blog you are ever likely to see. Read on and enjoy

 

 

It can’t be an easy way to earn a living, ferrying people wherever they want to go. Sometimes just a short drive away; sometimes a drive of an hour or more. What am I talking about, I hear you ask. Taxis. It is a precarious kind of existance. Sometimes, it might seem as if there aren’t enough hours, the fares come so thick and fast. Other times, the hours must drag by as a driver waits and waits in the hope that somebody, somewhere will need his (or her) services.

Why am I writing about taxis? Well, you would think that somebody who spends all day behind the wheel of a car would be a pretty good driver. You would. However, in reality, taxi drivers seem to be unable to grasp the essentials of road safety. Signalling? No chance. Leaving suitable braking distance between themselves and the vehicle in front? Do me a favour. Sticking to the speed limit? I should cocoa. Of course, it depends if there is a passenger on board. If there is, you can bet that the taxi is the fastest thing on the road. If it is just the driver in the car you could probably walk faster. Why is that?

Where am I heading with all this? [My thoughts exactly. Yawn. - Ed.] Yesterday, I saw taxi-driving at its worst and was on the verge of tearing up my driving licence vowing never to drive again. Let me explain. Early in the day, I was driving along a street which had speed ‘humps’ to slow traffic down. Every hundred metres or so, there is a pair of humps. They are there to keep the speed down to 30mph. These humps are positioned side by side, one on each lane of the road. The correct way to approach them is to ‘centre’ them so that the car wheels roll over the lowest part. By straddling the hump in this way it is possible to drive fairly quickly with only a slight bump. If you misjudge the move and don’t have the hump centred, it can cause quite a jolt. There is a way to avoid any jolt at all, but it is not only illegal, it is downright dangerous. If you drive down the centre of the road, the wheels don’t touch the humps at all. It is a dodgy manoeuvre to attempt and nobody in their right mind would do it unless there was no other vehicle on the road. So it came as a bit of a shock to me yesterday when I was driving along this road with several cars coming in the opposite direction. All were straddling the humps in the proscribed manner except one which was heading towards me along the centre line. I actually had to brake quite suddenly to ensure that my car didn’t have its bodywork altered. I could see the panic on the face of the driver of that oncoming car; he obviously hadn’t noticed a large red vehicle approaching him. You have already guessed this driver’s profession, haven’t you? Yep. Taxi driver.

Another incident happened later in the day. I have told you before that I live in a town which had as its CB ‘handle’ (I know all the modern jargon.) [Modern??? - Ed.] Polomint City. The reason for this name is the profusion of roundabouts. On the roads. I’m not talking about swing parks. At the last count it was something over 600. I’m not making that up. There really are that many roundabouts on the town’s roads. Obviously, some of these are of the ‘mini’ variety; one of those two-metre diameter concrete pancakes designed to confuse motorists as they approach it and can’t decide who has right of way. It is one such that nearly resulted in the demise of yours truly. This particular small roundabout is positioned where the street on which I live meets the main road (the same road that has the humps, incidentally). The procedure for using this roundabout is the same as any other: give way to vehicles on the right. With me so far? I approached the end of my street and wished to turn right. Thus, I stopped, checked that no traffic was coming from my right and, seeing the road clear, I began to move. I don’t know why I didn’t set off quickly, but, thank goodness, I didn’t. A vehicle on the main road, screamed across my path at around 50 miles per hour (on a 30mph limit road). The driver had made no attempt to slow to see if there was a vehicle approaching from his (it was a he) right. He couldn’t have done. He drove as if there was no roundabout there. Need I tell you what he did for a living? Uhuh. Taxi driver. I don’t think he had been using those speed humps properly, either. How else could he have reached that speed?

A third incident was even more scary. I was approaching a roundabout (a different one) on the inside lane and signalling to turn left. With me so far? I was about to enter the roundabout when a car drew up on the outside lane. It was driven by a man, incidentally. I set off. So did he. I turned left. So did he. Honestly. From the outside lane, he turned left. A dangerous manoeuvre, I am sure you will agree. I might have been the sort of dithering old codger [You said it. - Ed.] who signals without meaning to. I might have left the indicators on from the previous roundabout. In other words, I might have been planning to go straight on at that roundabout. I’ll give you three guesses what the driver did for a living... apart from drive like a maniac, that is. Got it in one.

That isn’t the end of yesterday’s road incidents. I was driving along a dual-carriageway. It was about a mile long stretch between two full-sized roundabouts. I entered this stretch of road and saw a car being driven, not very quickly, along the outside lane. Now, that is wrong. It wasn’t a taxi driver, incidentally. The outside lane of any road should only be used for overtaking, in my view. Such behaviour can frustrate drivers who want to travel quicker. And so it did. I was travelling along the inside lane, the front of my car tracking the rear of the car in the outside lane. Then it happened. The driver of the car travelling behind me, dropped a gear and pulled quickly into the outside lane to pass me. He (Yes it was a he.) then ‘jooked’ in front of me to pass the car hogging the outside lane. Fortunately, I braked because, if I hadn’t, my car would have been reshaped by this overtaking/undertaking loony. As soon as he passed me, he dropped another gear and scooted into the outside lane in front of the slow-moving vehicle. He then raced ahead before having to brake suddenly for the fast-approaching roundabout. As he was braking, he cut back into the inside lane causing the drivers of the cars on the inside lane to brake harder than would normally be required.

By the time I reached the roundabout, I had moved into the outside lane as I was going to turn right. I had to stop at the roundabout, as did the overtaking loony. He was now to the left of me, there being another vehicle in front of each of us as we approached the roundabout. As we moved off, the car in front of me moved off at a reasonable rate while the one in front of loony was rather slower. What did loony driver do? He apparently decided he didn’t like following that car and simply drifted across my path as he straightened out the line of the roundabout as if it and I weren’t there. Once again my car’s brakes were employed to prevent some metalwork reshaping.

I’ll give you three guesses what that nutjob of a driver did for a living. Actually, I won’t. I can’t, because I don’t know. But if he ever fancied becoming a taxi driver, he seems perfectly qualified. Indeed, I think he might be a bit over-qualified.

 

 

.....oooOooo.....

 

Were any famous or notorious people born on the 22nd of April? Of course. Here are some I’ve even heard of. Henry Fielding 1707 (Tom Jones’ dad.), J. Robert Oppenheimer 1904 (Now I am become Death, the destroyer of worlds.), Eddie Albert 1906 (Actor blacklisted by HUAC in the 1950s... ‘Everyone was so full of fear. Many people couldn't support their families, or worse, their lives were ruined and they had to go out and do menial jobs. Some even killed themselves.’), Kathleen Ferrier 1912 (Contralto singer. First clip of the week is her rendition of Blow the Wind Southerly. ), Yehudi Menuhin 1916 (Fiddle player.), Charles Mingus 1922 (The Angry Man of Jazz. Clip number two coming up. Here’s Goodbye Porkpie Hat. ), Aaron Spelling 1923 (Ay Ay Ar Oh En.), Glen Campbell 1936 (Country singer and actor. Diagnosed in 2011 with Alzheimers, here is his final, poignant recording, I'm Not Gonna Miss You.), Jack Nicholson 1937 (Here’s Johnny.), Steve Fossett 1944 (Fly guy.), John Waters 1946 (Director of cult films. I said cult.), Peter Frampton 1950 (Geetarist. Here’s an early clip from his days in The Herd. Recorded at the height of flower power... From the Underworld ), Paul Carrack 1951 (Highly regarded musician. Clip number five features his most famous toon.), Lloyd Honeyghan 1960 (Boxy bloke.), Ricardo izecson dos Santos Leite 1982 (Who? Oh, Kaka, the well-known footballer. Hang on, doesn’t Kaka translate as poo?), David Luiz 1987 (Long-haired footy bloke.), John Obe Mikel 1987 (Footy bloke.) and Oscar Gonzalez 1990 (At this point I would normally say simply ‘Boxy bloke’. However, in view of this man’s brief career, I will say more. In his last bout he was knocked out in the tenth round. He suffered severe brain damage and immediately fell into a coma. Two days later, he was pronounced dead. He was 23. Am I the only one who wants to see this barbaric sport banned?).

 

 

.....oooOooo.....
 

Let’s move on to grambling matters. How did we do last week? We won. No, really we did. We got a return of £2.50 on our bet. 30 pees profit. Woo hoo! What happened? Read on...

 

Motherwell vs Inverness - Prediction Home win

Result - Motherwell 4 Inverness 2

Yay!

Well raced into the lead with goals from Chris Cadden and Louis Moult.

Inverness replied through Alex Fisher, who turned Liam Polworth's tame effort into the net.

Fisher equalised after the break with a delightful lob but a Scott McDonald goal and a header from Allan Campbell won it for the hosts.

All together now... Well shake it up baby...

 

Falkirk vs St Mirren - Prediction Home win

Result - Falkirk 2 St Mirren 2

Ooh! ’It the bar!

Rory Loy's controlled finish put the buoyant Buddies ahead before Lee Miller equalised from close range for Falkirk.

Captain Stephen McGinn restored Saints' lead with a wonderful 20-yard curler.

But substitute (ex Motherwell man) Bob McHugh, 20 seconds after his arrival, popped up to hammer home a second equaliser.

 

Alloa vs Brechin - Prediction Home win

Result - Alloa 6 Brechin 1

An emphatic Yay!

Brechin actually took the lead with Andy Jackson’s 23rd minute left footed shot into the bottom right corner.

Alloa equalised just two minutes later with a Stefan McCluskey header. Number two for Alloa came from Greig Spence on 32 minutes. Alloa’s third came immediately after the break when a Calum Waters cross was met by Jason Marr who netted from close range.

Alloa’s fourth came courtesy of a penalty from Spence after Graeme Smith was red carded for a foul on Calum Waters in the penalty area.

Goal number five came from an Iain flannigan free kick into the top right corner. On 83 minutes Flannigan grabbed his second and Alloa’s sixth to complete the rout.

Stranraer vs Airdrie - Prediction Home win

Result - Stranraer 2 Airdrie 1

Yay!

Arbroath vs Edinburgh - Prediction Home win

Result - Arbroath 0 Edinburgh 1

Boo!

Sorry about the lack of match info, but you know by now that the matches in Scotland’s two divisions don’t warrant a match report from the jounalists who are supposedly working for a corporation that covers all of ‘Britain’. And they wonder why Scotland wants a referendum...

What about this week’s predictions?

Game - Result - Odds

Hull vs Watford - Prediction Home win - 10/11

Chesterfield vs Charlton - Prediction Away win - 17/20

Port Vale vs Bolton - Prediction Away win - 4/5

Luton vs Notts County - Prediction Home win - 8/11

Portsmouth vs Cambridge - Prediction Home win - 17/20

All matches kick off at 3pm on Saturday the 22nd of April. The bets have been placed (10 x 20 pee doubles plus 1 x 20 pee accumulator) and if they all go according to The Grambler’s Prediction, the Bobby Moore Fund stands to receive a whopping...

£10.72

How whopping is that? Moderately, I would say.

 

.....oooOooo.....

 

Teaser time. Yay! Last week I asked you who was the player that Manchester United paid a record transfer fee for prior to Paul Pogba. The answer was Angel di Maria for a ‘mere’ £59.7 millions in 2014. After one year, during which he made 27 appearances for Man U, he was sold on to PSG for £44 millions. Thus, he cost Man U over half a million quid for every game he played and that was before his hefty pay packet was taken into consideration.

One for this week? Let’s have a Scottish football question and it concerns the 1998 World Cup squad. Which Scottish midfielder nearly emulated his father by playing in the 1998 World Cup finals, but remained an unused squad member?

 

…..oooOooo…..

 

As usual, let’s finish with a mention of the main reason for continuing to publish this blog – to raise awareness about bowel cancer. If you have any bowel problems, don’t be fobbed off with the line that you are too young for bowel cancer to be a consideration. Just point your doctor in the direction of http://www.bowelcanceruk.org.uk/campaigns-policy/latest-campaigns/never-too-young-campaign


…..oooOooo…..

 

And finally, Cyril? And finally Esther, I am indebted to R and B Moore who finish this week’s (g)ramble with something we haven’t had for a while - the dodgy album cover. We know what the title refers to, but old Rex has a guilty look on his coupon, it could equally be a complaint from Beth.

 

 


 

Happy grambling.

 

Friday, 14 April 2017

Week 36 - Happy grambleday Samantha Fox


Stewart was an amazing person - A wonderful husband, a fantastic brother, a loving son and an adored uncle. He was also a brilliant friend and colleague and is missed by so many people. His family are determined that his death will never be in vain and are doing their part to beat bowel cancer for good. We are fundraising for the Bobby Moore Fund which is part of Cancer Research UK and specialises in research into bowel cancer. If you wish to donate to the fund, you can via https://www.justgiving.com/Geraldine-Smith3 .

If you haven’t already done so, please read the article which appeared in the Daily Record and learn from Stewart’s story that you must never be complacent. It makes grim reading for us, his family, even though we were beside him throughout his ordeal, or battle; call it what you will. http://www.dailyrecord.co.uk/lifestyle/heartbroken-widow-geraldine-smith-raises-3452997

Similarly, if you haven’t heard it, please listen to Geraldine’s moving radio interview which was on Radio Scotland recently.


Stewart began writing The Grambler when he was between procedures and hoping for some form of recovery. He loved all aspects of football and was a lifelong Motherwell supporter. His wish was that The Grambler should continue after his death and I have been happy to oblige. Welcome to The Grambler, the most ill-informed blog you are ever likely to see. Read on and enjoy

 

My heart was broken
My heart was broken
Sorrow
Sorrow
Sorrow
My heart was broken
My heart was broken

What's going off, I hear you ask. Has the Grambler been watching Motherwell again? No. In case you didn't know, those were the opening lyrics to a song by the Proclaimers called Sunshine on Leith [I thought the Proclaimers were called Craig and Charlie. - Ed.]. Ahem. That was also the title song from a musical featuring the songs of the Proclaimers.
It seems to be the way of it these days. Instead of taking a story and writing songs to suit it to make a musical, anyone planning a musical takes the songs and builds a story around them. While the older method used to give you a reasonable story with some good, iffy or downright awful songs, this method gives you good songs with an iffy story.
Sometimes the songs are taken from a particular era such as Dreamboats and Petticoats which revolves around songs from the nineteen fifties.
The current fashion seems to be to take the songs of a particular artist or band and concoct a story around them. Several acts have had the treatment. Perhaps the most famous is Abba with Mamma Mia. Not to be confused with the Liverpool comedy, Mam, I'm here. Others include Our House with the songs of Madness. There is also the musical formed around the songs of Sir Rodney of Stewart, Tonight's the Night. Can't understand the choice of that for the main title. Well I could until I watched a jokey programme about the seventies that was on tv recently. Sorry pardon excuse me? I had never analysed the lyrics to that song before. This programme did. It's filthy. And not just a little bit suspect; it is absolutely suspect. Here's a line or two...
You'd be a fool to stop this tide
Spread your wings and let me come inside
What? That is just shocking. There's worse to come; the next line goes...
Don't say a word my virgin child.
I hope you weren't drinking tea when you read that; I've a feeling you may have spluttered it all over yourself. Come inside? Virgin? Child? How the hell did he get away with it?
Any road up, Tonight's the Night (the musical, not the song) was written by Ben Elton. Oh dear. I have never seen Tonight's the Night but I have seen another Ben Elton scripted musical and I can honestly say it is the biggest load of tosh I have ever watched in a theatre. I am talking about the original of this type of musical - We Will Rock You; an awful story featuring the wonderful music of Queen. Yes the songs are terrific, but the story? Oh dear, oh dear, oh dear. Utterly utterly dreadful. I honestly thought it would be quite good. I used to watch Ben Elton in his stand up comedian days and I liked him a lot. I thought his Black Adder scripts were brilliant. I read his novels and thoroughly enjoyed them. We Will Rock You ought to have been fantastic given his credentials. It is not. The story, such as it is, is ludicrous. I won't bore you with details but it revolves around a group of people whose ancestors have survived some sort of holocaust and the jokes (Jokes! Ha!) revolve around them finding artefacts from the current era. For some odd reason there is a mythical guitar imbedded in a wall and the story is based on this tribe's efforts to find it. I think Brian May might have had much to do with the storyline, so perhaps Elton was hampered by a crap story before he even put pen to paper.
Far better than coming up with a story in this way is to simply tell the story of the people whose music the show is based on. The Jersey Boys about the Four Seasons and Sunny Afternoon on the Kinks fit into this category.
Better still, in my view, is where the story is dispensed with entirely and the audience is just treated to an artist or band's music. This is how a show I recently went to works. The show is Thriller. Go on, have a guess whose music it covers. There is simply a spoken introduction and an occasional fact along the way but, otherwise, it is wall to wall Michael Jackson songs. It is the second time I have been to see the show and it has evolved a bit but the essence is the same. Excellent singers and talented, exuberant dancers putting on a really slick show.
I know the Queen show has probably made more money at the box office, but, even though I'm not a Michael Jackson fan as such, I know which show I would happily see again and again. All together now...
Keep on, to the post office
Don't stop till you get enough
[I think you may have misheard that lyric. - Ed.]

 

 

.....oooOooo.....

 

Were any famous or notorious people born on the 8th of April? Of course. Here are some I’ve even heard of. Leonardo da Vinci 1452 (Painter, sculptor, architect, inventor, scientist, musician, mathematician, engineer, writer, anatomist, geologist, astronomer, botanist, historian and cartographer... In fact a right old smarty boots.), Henry James 1843 (‘I've always been interested in people, but I've never liked them.’), Percy Shaw 1890 (Who? Inventor. The cat’s eye in the middle of the road was probably his best known invention.), Nikita Kruschev 1894 (First Secretary of the Communist Party of the USSR following the death of Stalin.), Bessie Smith 1894 (‘Empress of the Blues’. Here’s this week’s first clip; Bessie in 1929 singing St. Louis Blues.), Joe Davis 1901 (Snooker player before the sport became celebrated. He helped organise the first world championship in 1927, and bought the trophy which is used to this day. It was the first of his 15 world titles and he won a first prize of £6 10s. Last year’s winner Mark Selby won £330,000.), Kim Il-sung 1912 (Supreme leader of North Korea. His birthday is celebrated as ‘The Day of the Sun’.), Neville Marriner 1924 (Conductor. Founded St Martin in the Fields.), Elizabeth Montgomery 1933 (Her from Bewitched that wiggled her nose.), Claudia Cardinale 1938 (Italian actress who was raised in Tunis so spoke Italian with a French accent. Her voice was dubbed in her first Italian film.), Reg Smith 1939 (Who? Better known as singer Marty Wilde. Clip number two coming up. What was Marty’s biggest hit? That’s right. Teenager in Love. So here’s Abbagavenny.), Jeffrey Archer 1940 (Dodgy politician and author.), Dave Edmunds 1944 (Welsh singer/guitarist. Ready for clip number three? His most famous hit was I Hear You Knocking, so here’s Girls Talk.), Dodi Fayed 1955 (Film producer. Famously died in a car crash.), Benjamin Zephaniah 1958 (Broomie powet.), Emma Thomson 1959 (Ectress, donchaknow. Nanny McPhee. That was her.), Samantha Fox 1966 (Singer, songwriter and actress it says in her blurb. Nah. Page Three model, that’s all she’s remembered for.), Seth Rogen 1982 (Actor. Voices Mantis in the Kung Fu Panda films.), Eliza Doolittle 1988 (Singer. Clip number five? Time to pack up?) and Emma Watson 1990 (Harry Potter’s bird.).

 

 

.....oooOooo.....
 

Let’s move on to grambling matters. How did we do last week? Better than the week before, I can tell you. We got a return of £2.13 on our bet. So, only 7 pees down. Woo... a 4p improvement on the week before. What happened? Read on...

 

 

Blackburn vs Barnsley - Prediction Home win

Result - Blackburn 0 Barnsley 2

Boo!

Marc Roberts headed Barnsley into a deserved third-minute lead.

Things got worse for the hosts in the 10th minute when Marley Watkins struck a spectacular second - his ninth of the season.

Hmm. Not a good start for The Grambler.

 

Norwich vs Reading - Prediction Home win

Result - Norwich 7 (That’s seven) Reading 1

An emphatic Yay!

Norwich were 4-0 up within 31 minutes through Nelson Oliveira's penalty, Wes Hoolahan's chip, Alex Pritchard's 25-yard shot and Russell Martin's tap in.

Pritchard slotted in his second before Yann Kermorgant pulled one back, only for Hoolahan to tap in for 6-1.

Mitchell Dijks hit the bar for the Canaries before substitute Cameron Jerome slotted in number seven late on.

 

Accrington vs Crewe - Prediction Home win

Result - Accrington 3 Crewe 2

Yay!

Calum Cooke opened the scoring for Crewe on the quarter of an hour with a brilliant 25-yard effort.

Crewe continued to create the better chances and George Cooper's ball in on 41 minutes found Chris Dagnall, who dinked the ball home.

Stanley got one back on 57 minutes when Mark Hughes scrambled the ball home from close range from a Sean McConville corner.

Four minutes later, Stanley won a free-kick on the edge of the area and Shay McCartan fired it home.

Hughes made the comeback complete on 79 minutes when Crewe failed to clear another McConville corner and he was there at the far post to fire home.

All together now...  Everybody Stanley...

 

Blackpool vs Grimsby - Prediction Home win

Result - Blackpool 1 Grimsby 3

Boo!

Danny Collins' header was cancelled out by Andrew Boyce's own goal as half-time approached, but the Mariners had enough time to retake the lead before the interval through Sam Jones. Jones bagged a brace with a 70th-minute strike settling matters in the visitors' favour.

 

Doncaster vs Mansfield - Prediction Home win

Result - Doncaster 1 Mansfield 0

Yay!

Doncaster Rovers won promotion back to League One at the first attempt after a narrow win over Mansfield.

Tommy Rowe's header from sub James Coppinger's corner was enough to see off the Stags.

Ben Whiteman went close to a leveller but his curled effort was just wide.

Rovers, relegated to League Two last May, have spent the majority of the season at the top of the table and now need just eight points to claim the title.

 

That was last week, what has The Grambler got for us this week? As most games in the English leagues are taking place on Good Friday, he/she/it is left with mainly Scottish games to consider...

Game - Result - Odds

Motherwell vs Inverness - Prediction Home win - 7/5

Falkirk vs St Mirren - Prediction Home win - 17/20

Alloa vs Brechin - Prediction Home win - 3/4

Stranraer vs Airdrie - Prediction Home win - Evens

Arbroath vs Edinburgh - Prediction Home win - 4/6

 

 

All matches kick off at 3pm on Saturday the 15th of April. The bets have been placed (10 x 20 pee doubles plus 1 x 20 pee accumulator) and if they all go according to The Grambler’s Prediction, the Bobby Moore Fund stands to receive a whopping...

£12.62

That is incredibly whopping... Not happy about Motherwell being in there, though.

 

.....oooOooo.....

 

Teaser time. Yay! Last week I asked you who was the only player to come close to Rush’s record with 19 goals scored in Liverpool derbies. A clue was that in his career of 447 games he scored a staggering 390 goals. The answer was Everton’s William ‘Dixie’ Deans. Why Dixie, I hear you ask. There are two stories claiming to give the reason behind his nickname. One suggests it was a corruption of his childhood nickname of ‘Digsy’. Apparently, when he played tig he used to dig his fist into his pals’ backs. Hmm... Another, slightly racist, suggestion is that he had a swarthy complexion and curly black hair. Because of this and the fact that black minstrel songs often mentioned Dixie, he was saddled with the epithet. As I said, a bit racist, but more plausible given the thinking in those prewar times.

One for this week? Why not. Let’s have a transfer related question. Okay, everyone knows that Manchester United paid a record transfer fee for Paul Pogba of no fixed hairstyle, but who was that club’s previous signing for (at the time) a British record transfer fee?

 

 

…..oooOooo…..

 

As usual, let’s finish with a mention of the main reason for continuing to publish this blog – to raise awareness about bowel cancer. If you have any bowel problems, don’t be fobbed off with the line that you are too young for bowel cancer to be a consideration. Just point your doctor in the direction of http://www.bowelcanceruk.org.uk/campaigns-policy/latest-campaigns/never-too-young-campaign


…..oooOooo…..

 

And finally, Cyril? And finally Esther, I am indebted to a Miss S. Fox who celebrates birthday this weekend. Earlier, I remarked that she was famous only for displaying her rather large breasts on page three of a certain daily newspaper/comic. There is one other ‘moment’ for which she is remembered. That moment was her making a right hash of presenting the Brit Awards with Mick Fleetwood back in 1989. It really was one of the most cringe-inducing programmes ever transmitted on British television. Want to see some clips from it?  Of course you do.
 


 

Happy grambling.

 

Thursday, 6 April 2017

Week 35 - The Grambler and Scooby Doo


Stewart was an amazing person - A wonderful husband, a fantastic brother, a loving son and an adored uncle. He was also a brilliant friend and colleague and is missed by so many people. His family are determined that his death will never be in vain and are doing their part to beat bowel cancer for good. We are fundraising for the Bobby Moore Fund which is part of Cancer Research UK and specialises in research into bowel cancer. If you wish to donate to the fund, you can via https://www.justgiving.com/Geraldine-Smith3 .

If you haven’t already done so, please read the article which appeared in the Daily Record and learn from Stewart’s story that you must never be complacent. It makes grim reading for us, his family, even though we were beside him throughout his ordeal, or battle; call it what you will. http://www.dailyrecord.co.uk/lifestyle/heartbroken-widow-geraldine-smith-raises-3452997

Similarly, if you haven’t heard it, please listen to Geraldine’s moving radio interview which was on Radio Scotland recently.


Stewart began writing The Grambler when he was between procedures and hoping for some form of recovery. He loved all aspects of football and was a lifelong Motherwell supporter. His wish was that The Grambler should continue after his death and I have been happy to oblige. Welcome to The Grambler, the most ill-informed blog you are ever likely to see. Read on and enjoy

 

I was out with friends a while back and, as I was the designated misery guts aka driver, I had to stick to non-alcoholic beverages. Now, I don’t much like sugary soft drinks and you can only take so much coffee of an evening so I opted to have a no-alcohol lager. ‘Have you got any Beck’s Blue?’ I asked the barman, whose response shocked me a little. ‘We’ve got hee haw,’ was his reply.

Now for those of you who do not live in Scotland, I should explain that hee haw is a typically Glaswegian term meaning nothing, zero, zilch. It is derived from the even worse f*** all. The pronunciation of ‘all’ usually being aw. Thus, hee haw is actually rhyming slang.

So when I was told that there was hee haw, I was somewhat taken aback. However, the barman made amends by explaining that there was actually now a, locally produced, alcohol-free lager called Hee Haw, because there was hee haw alcohol in it. Get it?

That is just so typical of the Glasgow sense of humour and the playful way the language is altered. I think I have mentioned other slang terms such as the now universal use of Ruby for curry, or a pint of Mick for lager and don’t forget the wonderful Jon Bons for overalls. Sorry pardon excuse me? John Bon Jovis = ovies = overalls.  A wee Salvi anyone?  A wee Salvador Dali = Swally = drink.

This has all reminded me of the tale of the English boss of a company coming up to Glasgow to find out why a building job was running late and (inadvisably perhaps) going up to a typical worker...

‘Why is this job running behind schedule?’ enquires the boss.

‘Ah hivnae got a scooby.’ replies the workman.

‘Right, if that's what's holding you up, I’ll make sure one gets ordered straight away.’

He must have been the only guy in Britain who didn’t realise that scooby = Scooby Doo = clue.

I have a favourite tale of having fun with words. Cast your collective mind back to 1995-96. Do you remember a band going by the name of Umboza? You don’t? You probably aren’t alone; they didn’t hang around the charts for very long. They were a Scottish outfit who had top 20 hits with a couple of toons. I recall their appearance on Top of the Pops to play their first hit (Cry India - based on a sample of Lionel Ritchie’s All Night Long - click here to give it a listen.) and Peter Powell introducing them as Umboza which made me think, no that’s not right. Why did I think this? Well, I knew the tune and I knew the band and that wasn’t their name. For some reason which I fail to understand, it was considered necessary to change the band's original name when fame came a-calling. What was the name that had to be changed? Mboza Ritchie... It’s all about the pronunciation.

 
 

.....oooOooo.....

 

Were any famous or notorious people born on the 8th of April? Of course. Here are some I’ve even heard of. Adrian Boult 1889 (Conductor. [Must have been before the one man buses. - Ed.]), Mary Pickford 1892 (Removals firm.), Sonja Henie 1912 (Skatey bloke.), Ian Smith 1919 (Prahm meenister of Rowdesia.), Carmen McRae 1922 (Jehhhzzz singer. Ready for this week’s first clip? Okeydokey. Here she is providing vocals to Dave Brubeck’s Take Five.), Jacques Brel 1929 (Influential Belgian singer/songwriter. Time for clip two... You might recognise this.), John Gavin 1931 (Actor who became a politician. He was US Ambassador to Mexico from 1981 to 1986.), Kofi Annan 1938 (7th Secretary General of the United Nations.), Vivienne Westwood 1941 (Woman who made binbags fashionable.), Roger Chapman 1942 (Vocalist with the first band I ever saw live. A unique voice, I am sure you will agree. Clip number three coming up.  All together now... Lay down easy...), James Herbert 1943 (Orfer. Did you know he designed all the covers for his books? You didn’t? Well, he did.), Hywell Bennett 1944 (Shelley.), Steve Howe 1947 (Geetarist. Clip number four... here is a young Mr Howe and his party piece The Clap.), Jeffrey Isbell aka Izzy Stradlin 1962 (A Gun or a Rose. He co-wrote this week’s clip number five...  I'll name that tune in one.), Julian Lennon 1963 (Singer with an ever-so-slightly more famous dad. Ready for clip number six? Here’s Saltwater.), Alec Stewart 1963 (Crickety wickety bloke.) and Mark Blundell 1966 (Racey car bloke.).

 

.....oooOooo.....

 

Let’s move on to grambling matters. How did we do last week? Better than the week before, I can tell you. We got a return of £2.09 on our bet. So, only 11 pees down. What happened? Read on...

 

 

 

Bristol Rovers vs Shrewsbury - Prediction Home win

Result - Bristol Rovers 2 Shrewsbury 0

Yay!

Billy Bodin fired the hosts in front from the penalty spot in the 54th minute after being fouled inside the box by Aristote Nsiala when there appeared no danger.

And Bodin made sure of the points seven minutes from time, showing neat skills to set himself up for a crisp right-footed finish from 10 yards.

The first half was most notable for the two yellow cards picked up by Shrewsbury midfielder Ryan Yates, sent off for a sliding late challenge on Rovers goalkeeper Joe Lumley in the 41th minute, having previously been booked for a foul on Bodin.

 

Fleetwood Town vs Swindon - Prediction Home win

Result - Fleetwood 0 Swindon 1

Boo!

Fleetwood made most of the early running in this match, with their best opportunity coming when David Ball picked out Kyle Dempsey, only for Ash Hunter to be unable to get a toe on the through-ball as Lawrence Vigouroux gathered

Swindon might have grabbed the lead on the half hour, against the run of play as Thomas let fly with a snap-shot from the edge of the box which forced a superb diving save from Alex Cairns.

Fleetwood continued to be frustrated after half-time, and Uwe Rosler threw on two substitutes in a bid to shake up an average display.

But it was Swindon who found another gear, Thomas poking just wide having been left unmarket at the near post.

And with nine minutes remaining Nicky Ajose scored the only goal of the match. Running onto a long through-ball from Charlie Colkett he got the wrong side of Ashley Eastham before slotting low under Cairns to claim the victory.

 

Millwall vs Scunthorpe - Prediction Home win

Result - Millwall 3 Scunthorpe 1

Yay!

Shaun Williams put Millwall ahead when he converted an early penalty after Shaun Hutchinson was brought down by Paddy Madden in the second minute.

Millwall should have doubled their lead in 31st minute, Steve Morison finding Jed Wallace at the back post, but the winger's effort went high and wide.

Ivan Toney's half-volley from 25 yards was tipped over the bar by Tom King as Scunthorpe looked for a way back into the game after the restart.

Wallace missed another good chance when he blazed over from 12 yards with the goal at his mercy.

However, Millwall got a deserved two-goal lead in 57th minute when Shane Ferguson tapped in Wallace's cross from close range.

Aiden O'Brien then got himself on the scoresheet after 68 minutes with a lovely finish, flicking Tony Craig's teasing ball beyond Joe Anyon.

Matt Crooks pulled a goal back when he nodded in a free-kick in the third minute of added time.

 

Rochdale vs Northampton - Prediction Home win

Result - Rochdale 1 Northampton 1

Ooh! ’It the bar!

In a low-key affair of few chances, Rochdale looked to have secured the points when NathanielMendez-Laing curled home a neat finish from the edge of the area in the 57th minute.

Northampton’s Paul Anderson sent a side-footed attempt narrowly wide of Conrad Logan's post and went even closer minutes later when his firm header towards the roof of the net was palmed away by the Dale goalkeeper.

But Anderson raced onto a hopeful punt upfield by Adam Smith and lifted the ball over a stranded Logan to give the visitors a draw three minutes into time added on.

 

Southend vs Oldham - Prediction Home win

Result - Southend 3 Oldham 0

Yay!

The Shrimpers had influential midfielder Ryan Leonard sent off 20 minutes from time when the game was still goalless.

But strikes from Nile Ranger and Theo Robinson and a stoppage-time penalty by Anthony Wordsworth saw them secure a hard-fought victory.

 

Can The Grambler improve enough to make us a wee profit this week? [Doubtful. - Ed.] Here are his/her/its predictions for this week...

Game - Result - Odds

Blackburn vs Barnsley - Prediction Home win - Evens

Norwich vs Reading - Prediction Home win - 10/11

Accrington vs Crewe - Prediction Home win - 10/11

Blackpool vs Grimsby - Prediction Home win - 5/6

Doncaster vs Mansfield - Prediction Home win - 8/11

 

All matches kick off at 3pm on Saturday the 8th of April. The bets have been placed (10 x 20 pee doubles plus 1 x 20 pee accumulator) and if they all go according to The Grambler’s Prediction, the Bobby Moore Fund stands to receive a whopping...

£11.67

That is quite whopping... even more whopping than last week.

 

.....oooOooo.....
 

Teaser time. Yay! Last week I asked you which player has scored the most times in a Liverpool derby. The answer should be obvious, really; Liverpool’s greatest ever goalscorer, Ian Rush. He scored 25 goals against Everton. He played 660 games for Liverpool in his career and scored 346 goals.

One for this week? I’m going to stick with the same topic. Sort of. The only player to come close to Rush’s record scored 19 goals in Liverpool derbies and in a career of 447 games scored a staggering 390 goals. Who was that man? Easy peasy.

 

…..oooOooo…..
 

As usual, let’s finish with a mention of the main reason for continuing to publish this blog – to raise awareness about bowel cancer. If you have any bowel problems, don’t be fobbed off with the line that you are too young for bowel cancer to be a consideration. Just point your doctor in the direction of http://www.bowelcanceruk.org.uk/campaigns-policy/latest-campaigns/never-too-young-campaign


…..oooOooo…..
 

And finally, Cyril? And finally Esther, I don’t normally mark the anniversary of somebody dying, but this week I am making an exception. A little teaser to finish... Who died on April the 8th four years ago? Need a clue?  This should help...

 

 


Incidentally, the chap in the middle,
actor Jerry Malen, is the last surviving ‘Munchkin’
 

Happy grambling.