Stewart was an amazing
person - A wonderful husband, a fantastic brother, a loving son and an
adored uncle. He was also a brilliant friend and colleague and will be
missed by so many people. His family are determined that his death will never
be in vain and are doing their part to beat bowel cancer for good. We are fundraising for the Bobby Moore Fund
which is part of Cancer Research UK and specialises in research into bowel
cancer. If you wish to donate to the
fund, you can via https://www.justgiving.com/Geraldine-Smith3
.
If you haven’t already
done so, please read the article which recently appeared in the Daily Record
and learn from Stewart’s story that you must never be complacent. It makes grim reading for us, his family,
even though we were beside him throughout his ordeal, or battle; call it what
you will. http://www.dailyrecord.co.uk/lifestyle/heartbroken-widow-geraldine-smith-raises-3452997
His wish was that The Grambler
should continue after his death and I have been happy to oblige. Welcome to The Grambler, the most
ill-informed blog you are ever likely to see. Read on and enjoy…
Right this week’s rant is not going to surprise anyone. As the World Cup approaches I am going to
have a go at ‘the media’. Specifically
those involved with coverage of sport, more specifically football, even more
specifically World Cup football. And yet
more specifically a World Cup that took place the best part of 50 years
ago. It was won by a country who had
never come close to winning it before and has never been particularly close to
winning it since. If it had been any
country other than Engerland it would have been dismissed as a fluke. Nothing more, nothing less. However because it was Engerland, every
English football spokesperson (and Alan Hansen) bleats on about our plucky lads
every chance they get and think that at every World Cup the English team
actually stands a chance. Sorry all you
Engerland fans out there but it isn’t going to happen.
Think about it. The team that won
back in…when was it again?...was made up of players who all played in top
clubs. In England. They were the crème de la crème of English
football. They were all great players
certainly, but they played at a time when English clubs employed mainly English
players. Thus, they were the very best
players in England at that time. You saw
my statistics a few weeks ago (see http://www.thegrambler.com/2014/05/week-37-if-i-had-gramble.html
) in which I pointed out that in the top tier of English football nowadays a
very low percentage of players is actually English. So the ‘pool’ from which players are picked
is considerably smaller than it was back in…no, I can’t remember. If only there was somebody around who would
remind me what year it was… Also the
team that won it back then, had the advantage of playing for the World Cup in
their home country. It was at a time when
the highest percentage of spectators were from that country; not many could
afford to travel the world to watch their team back then in 19…erm…no, it’s
gone. So, basically the whole crowd was
cheering them on.
It was also a team that had played with a fairly unchanged lineup for quite
a while. Alf Ramsay, the manager, didn’t
chop and change his team too much. Do
you want a fact about Alf Ramsay? Do you
know what his nickname was in his playing days?
Bear in mind that we live in more enlightened times now. [You reckon? –
Ed.] It was a word that would have
anyone using it these days ending up charged with racism. He was called Darkie Ramsay because of his
swarthy complexion. As I say, changed
days. Where was I? Oh yes.
The players knew each other’s game inside out and played as a team and
not as a group of preening, overpaid and over-tattooed primadonnas.
And of course there was that dodgy linesman decision which snatched the
game from West Germany.
I digress. I don’t want England to
fail. I would be very happy if they
could win. After all, they live in a
country attached to my own. The closest
team for me to choose to support. Unfortunately,
as soon as the first match starts, no matter who is playing, the football
commentators and pundits will start prattling on about some tournament of
nearly half a century ago that was flukily won by a talented/lucky team who
just happened to come from England. It
puts me (and every non-English person in the British Isles) right off. In fact, it probably pisses most Engerland
supporters off too.
How long from the start of the very first game will somebody be compared to
Bobby Moore, a goal will be compared to one by Geoff Hurst or a save will be
made that was nearly on a par with one by Gordon Banks? How long until there is a piece of film with
Three lions on our shirts/World in motion used as background music.
There is only one cure for all this ‘Engerland is bound to win the World
Cup’ nonsense – TURN THE SOUND OFF!
If England were to actually win, I can promise you one thing - come
September and the Scottish people vote in the referendum for independence – the
decision will be a resounding yes, just because the jingoism from south of the
border would be utterly unbearable!
Right, having got that off my chest, let’s move on. Any birthdays of note this week? None other than Sir Thomas Jones Woodward. Who the fu… Who’s he? It’s only Jones the voice, look you. Yes it is Welsh Wales’ very own boyo, Tom
Jones isn’t it, dai bach. Yes, Jones the
voice was born in Pontypridd in Glamorgan on the 7th of June
1940. Do we have anything in his
repertoire worth gramblerising?
Something old? From the 60s
perhaps? It’s not unusual to gramble
with anyone…No, perhaps not. It’s good
to gramble the green green grass of home…Nah.
I know; here’s one from 2000, a gramblerised version of Sex Bomb…
Grambler, grambler,
you're a grambler
You can gramble to me when I need to come along
Grambler, grambler, you're my grambler
And baby you can gramble me on.
You can gramble to me when I need to come along
Grambler, grambler, you're my grambler
And baby you can gramble me on.
Do you want to know how The Grambler’s predictions fared
last week? You do? We won!
Yay! Sort of. Boo!
But we got a lot of money to give to the Bobby Moore Fund. Yay!
Just not as much as anticipated.
Boo.
Let me explain. We
had a bet on 5 races.
Right, with you so far.
10 doubles and a single 5 race accumulator.
Getting a bit technical,
now.
However, only 4 of the horses picked by The Grambler
actually ran.
Yawn.
In one race our choice didn’t run; it was a non-runner.
Ooh look, a bee.
Yeah. It’s not particularly
interesting, is it. The upshot is that
instead of the £21.18 we could have won, we got back just over 15 quids. Never mind, it is all heading for the
Grambler’s Kick Cancer’s backside fund (or Bobby Moore Fund).
So here is a quick roundup of what happened.
Meeting – Time – Horse – Odds
Fakenham 2.30 Midnight Diamond 5/2
It won.
It won.
It couldn’t be bothered running.
It won
It won
All this means that The Grambler
has done very well on the gee gees. In
three weeks he/she/it has amassed more than he/she/it did in 35 weeks of footie
predictions. It gives us a dilemma. Do we continue with the gee gee bet after the
football season starts? Hmm. Need to think about it. What do you think about it out there in
Gramblerland?
So to this week’s nags. What has The Grambler come up with today? Believe it or not, there are 36 meetings that
The Grambler could choose. We are
talking worldwide, here. That means
there are 316 races taking place! I
think we might restrict The Grambler to races reasonably close to home.
Okay, the predictions are in and,
I have to say, they don’t look too promising.
I know I always say that but, this week, I think I am right. In the races that came up for us in previous
weeks, there was a gulf between the favourite (The Grambler’s choice) and the
second favourite. Whatever, here they
are.
Meeting – Time – Horse – Odds
Hexham 2.10 Man With Van 4/5
Epsom Downs 2.40 Cirrus Des Aigles 5/4
Lingfield 7.25 Newton
There you have it my little
gramblerados; five meetings, five races.
The usual 10 doubles and a 5 race accumulator at 20 pees a bet. So this week, for our 2.2 quids and if all
predictions come up, the Bobby Moore Fund will benefit to the tune of…
£16.41
Not bad. Will it come up? Who knows?
Did you know this was Derby
Day? Well, it is. Here’s a nice little toon with a
film to go with it - Derby Day
Right. Time for the answer to last week’s
teaser. I asked what was the answer if
you subtracted the smallest ever crowd at a senior football match in Britain
from the largest ever crowd. First up –
the facts. The smallest crowd was at a
Scottish League Cup tie between Clydebank and East Stirling on the 31st
of July 1999 when just 29 folk bothered to turn up. The biggest crowd in Britain took place just
a few miles away at Hampden Park, a few years earlier, for the Scotland
Engerland clash of 1937 when (officially) 149,547 supporters were present. I added that ‘officially’ because in those
days parents would lift their kids over the turnstiles to avoid paying for
them, so I am guessing that the figure is lower than the real amount. Thus, the answer to last week was 149,518.
Now for this week’s teaser. The World Cup is less than a week away, so a
World Cup themed teaser is apt. Who has
scored more goals in World Cup finals tournaments than any other
individual? I’ll give you a clue, it’s
not a Brazilian with erectile disfunction.
To finish with, here’s a new
feature to amuse you (I hope). Oh goody. Lookalikes! Been
done. Not like this it hasn’t. First up a rather fancy building…
It’s the headquarters of the ING
Bank in Amsterdam. Take a look at it and
try convincing me and yourself that the architect wasn’t a fan of Doctor Who
back in the 70s.
Doctor Who’s
annoying robot sidekick, K9.
Happy grambling.
Argentina to win the world cup with messi as too scorer
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Top scorer
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